It’s ok to not know!

 




The past several days was a world wind of days for me! From meeting up with friends, volunteering, and having a girls’ weekend hiking to Devil’s Bathtub, with a bum knee, to moving back to Minnesota and playing ball again. My mind has been running so much this week and I haven’t really come up with what I want to blog about. You know what? That is OK!! THAT’S IT! (Lightbulb moment!)

As I sit here at the kitchen table in my parent’s house, I keep saying to myself, it’s all going to be ok. It’s ok to not know what’s going to happen. I have the right to sit in these feelings and feel them. I just can’t stay there too long. I almost feel like I am trying to prove something to someone. I recently said something similar to my mom. She asked me who is telling me these things. Who is that someone? I’ve realized that someone is me. I hold myself to such a high standard and I am starting to get tired. I know my parents don’t care if I become a Dean at a university. I know that my nieces and nephew don’t care that I have my own place to live and I know that my friends don’t care that I am single and my cats don’t care what I do as long as I come back to feed them! What they all do care about is that I am happy. So, let’s all stop being so hard on ourselves to prove something that we may not even want. Let’s stop and enjoy the moments. It’s ok to not know what the next step is. Having faith in God is where it’s all at. He’s got this so why are we trying to control things. I am sure he’s sitting up there with my grandparents just laughing and saying, just wait until you see what I have in store for you. Big plans Jodi Jabs. I’ve got big plans for you and it’s ok that you don’t know them. Just have faith!

What I do know is I am going to soak up every moment I have back in Minnesota with my friends and family. Who knows what the next step is and where it will lead me to? I sure don’t and I am starting to be ok with that.  What I do know is that I am going to finish baking this surprise cake for my nephew’s birthday. It’s a four-layer cake with a candy surprise!! I am going to mow my brother’s lawn and help clean out the medicine cabinets at my grandparent’s farmhouse and continue to take care of my one eyed (foster?) kitten! (I think he found his furever home with us!) I might even try my hand at making my Grandma Jabs’ dill pickles. It might not be much but it means a lot to those around me.

 

Smile and stay blessed!






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