Maximizing Mentorship

I was cleaning out files on my computer and I came across this article that my mentor and I wrote together but never got published! Enjoy!

A mentor/mentee relationship can help you grow, challenge you, and help you to not only be a better professional but a better person. My mentor has been my go-to person for years. Here is what WE have learned through mentorship: 

Seek out mentor when you are ready for one. Do not force it. Let the relationship grow naturally. It will be much more helpful. You might not be ready for a mentor the first day, month, year into your role. Find one when it’s right for you.  

Write down characteristics that are important to you in a mentor then seek out individuals that have those attributes. If you are passionate about something, find someone who is encouraging and will be a champion for you. When you have honed in on who you want for a mentor, start having intentional conversations with them. Invite them to grab coffee so when you ask them to be your mentor, it won’t be random.  

Pick your own: I once had a mentor assigned to me and it was not good. The next opportunity to foster a mentor/mentee relationship in graduate school. The relationship fizzled quickly. My current mentor happened because I WANTED a mentor. Our relationship grew organically at first but became very intentional. We not only discuss professional goals but our relationship has grown to where we are able to have authentic and genuine conversations. It just works -- and proved to be the perfect collaboration for this article. 

Mutually beneficial: My mentor had never presented at a student activities conference and I wanted to present something at the NC Drive- In. My mentor had recommended The Four Agreements: A Guide to Personal Freedom. This book was thought-provoking and really helped clarify some of the issues I was encountering. I asked my mentor to co-present with me. She was hesitant at first but agreed. This was the platform for us to begin to work together outside of a university. We really enjoyed working together so when I asked her to co-write this article, she was onboard right away.   

Higher education is a space in which mentorship has the power to transform our practice from good to great. I have learned over the years that there are a few things we can do as mentors to ensure that this time is well-spent for both parties. 

Make Time: Before committing to mentor anyone asking yourself if you have time; don’t say “yes” unless you know you can devote the time to this person. A mentor who has to continually reschedule or isn’t able to follow-through isn’t a valuable mentor. Be honest with yourself and your potential mentee regarding your ability to devote time to this potentially transformative relationship.  

Clarify Expectations: Let the mentee lead the agenda and encourage them to keep a journal or a list of topics they want to discuss, so that when you meet, they are ready to direct the conversation. If you want to lead, ask questions; never assume you know what they need. It is also important to clarify meeting frequency, how to be contacted, duration of the mentoring relationship and goals.  

Evaluate Effectiveness: Take a moment throughout the duration of the relationship to have a frank conversation to ensure that both parties are meeting expectations. I’ve heard from many mentors and mentees that they found out after the relationship ended something they wish they knew earlier. It can be difficult to address unmet expectations, but communicating clearly usually leads to a more fulfilling relationship. 

Be Open: As the mentor, you might assume that you are in the role of teacher/director or supervisor, but the beauty of a great mentoring relationship is that the commitment and the opportunity for growth is a two-way street. New professionals can give you new perspectives, ideas and resources. As Jodi mentioned, she has also stretched me to grow and develop by encouraging collaborative presentations, conference attendance and writing this very article!   

Finding a mentor can be a difficult task but it is worth it. A mentor/mentee relationship can provide many benefits and should be mutually beneficial. Together both parties can grow in ways that not only impact themselves but those around them.   

Stay blessed and smile!